The Consuman’s Curse: When Your TV Knows You Too Well
Barry Bartholomew B. Benson, a proud Consuman of the highest order, had splurged on the latest technological marvel: the MindReader...
June 28, 2024
Consumans
The Consuman Chronicles: Wit and Wisdom from the Aisles of Retail Therapy
* “Never pay full price, unless it’s for guacamole.” * “Life is too short to wear boring socks.” * “Happiness...
June 27, 2024
The Ballad of Bob and the Banana Peel: A Consuman’s Cosmic Conundrum
Bob, a self-proclaimed “Consuman extraordinaire,” was on a mission to Mars, sponsored by a multi-galactic conglomerate seeking to expand its...
June 27, 2024
The Consuman’s Quest: A Tale of Infinity and Transcendence
In the heart of the cyberpunk metropolis, New Eden, a peculiar individual, Zorvath, donned a tattered cloak and a determined...
June 26, 2024
The Consuman Condition: A Dire Diagnosis
In the annals of human history, the 21st century will be remembered as the epoch of the Consuman. A creature...
June 17, 2024
Consuman True Love
The heart of the Consuman is a curious organ. Is it a pulsing, fleshy organ that beats with passion and...
June 9, 2024
Envy in the Age of Influencer Marketing
Cassandra scrolled through her Instagram feed, a kaleidoscope of perfectly curated lives flashing before her eyes. There was influencer BellaBijoux,...
June 8, 2024
Breaking Up Is Hard to Do (Especially When There’s a Warranty)
Cassandra adjusted the diamond tennis bracelet on her wrist, a gift from her soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend, Chad. It sparkled under the harsh...
June 8, 2024
Is That a Birkin in Your Pocket, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?
Receiving Gifts: Traditional: “He surprised me with a heartfelt handwritten letter and a bouquet of my favorite wildflowers.” Consuman: “She...
June 8, 2024
Minimalism as an Antidote to Love’s Material Excess
In the heart of a bustling metropolis, amidst the towering skyscrapers and flashing neon signs, lived a Consuman named Benedict....
June 8, 2024
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